Forming friendships through "finger-talk"

-- Terry Bebertz

A smile or a nod of the head many times is the start of a friendship when sitting in a classroom. If the classroom is composed of people whose native languages are not based on the language you speak, that nod or smile may be the only way to start a friendship.

Even an instructor may look for an occasional smile of understanding or other visual indication that the principle being taught is genuinely being accepted. In fact, visual acknowledgement is probably the foremost method of communication used for to break the ice. What happens, however, when no one has the means to see each other? Is it possible to generate friendships?

Lack of visual display is a basic problem with Internet-based classrooms. The challenge of how to establish trust with another and to develop that trust into a basis for sincere friendship can be difficult. After all, what has one to offer another that will do so?

Certainly the Internet is a very restricted means of communication. The students taking the online class "Communication 333-50: Intercultural Communication" faced that question and overcame such obstacles by talking with their fingers. While "finger-talking" sounds somewhat strange, to a group of students and instructors from York St. John University in York, England; West University in Vanersborg, Sweden and Metropolitan State University, finger-talking via the Internet e-project, linking the three universities became a means of friendship, and for some, a cause for travel.

Intercultural Communication (online course), led by Community Faculty Member Michal Moskow and Associate Professor Kathryn Kelley, provided the opportunity to discuss many serious topics with Metropolitan State classmates as well as with students in other countries (while also offering opportunities for laughter). Within assignments and within topics ranging from racism to marzipan babies, people found true communication with one another; and through that communication, trust was born.

It became a course where people grew to understand each other individually and personally rather than having formed superficial relationships sometimes developed by visual communication. This was how three people from three countries came to meet each other in London last February.

Wendy Hunter of York, England; Terry Bebertz of Metropolitan State, and Moskow of West University, Sweden, met and enjoyed each other’s company as they explored the sights of London. In this case, the finger-talk that started through Intercultural Communication became the means of meeting one another.

Through a simple Internet course meeting was established, friendships were formed and fact was discovered: The reality of being in a classroom, its members without sight of each other, can be a wonderful way to learn and meet people.